Re: Impressing your boss

managers love metrics. Come up with some completely irrelevant statistics to do a 'db health check'. Show that these numbers are horrible. Then make some completely irrelevant change and show your boss the same irrelevant metrics and proclaim that the db is now healthy.

Spit out some archaic and jumbled techno-babble so that noone has any idea what you are talking about(they will assume you are smart, because only smart people talk like that).

this actually works... its also useful to get managers to go away when they get annoying.

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