Fw: Happy Holidays

From: Igor Neyman <ineyman_at_perceptron.com>
Date: Fri, 22 Dec 2000 12:16:44 -0500
Message-Id: <10718.125255@fatcity.com>

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PROGRAMMERS NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS=20
=20
Twas the night before implementation and all through the house=20 not a program was working, not even a browse.=20 The programmers hung round their cubes in despair=20 with hopes that a miracle soon would be there.=20 =20
The users were nestled all snug in their beds=20 while visions of inquiries danced in their heads.=20 When out of the cope there arose such a clatter=20 I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.=20 =20
And what to my wandering eyes should appear=20 but a super contractor with a six pack of beer.=20 His resume glowed with experience so rare=20 he turned out great code with a bit-pushers flair.=20 =20
More rapid than eagles, his programs they came -=20 he whistled and shouted and called them by name;=20 "on update, on add, on enquire, on delete, on batch jobs,=20 on closing, on function complete."=20
=20
His eyes were glazed over, fingers nimble and lean=20 from weekends and nights spent in front of the screen.=20 A wink of his eye and a twist of his head=20 soon gave me to know I had nothing dread.=20 =20
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work=20 turning specs into code; then he turned with a jerk=20 and laying his finger upon the enter key,=20 the system came up and worked perfectly.=20 =20
The updates updated, the deletes they deleted,=20 the inquiries inquired, the closing completed.=20 He tested each whistle, he tested each bell,=20 and with nary abend, all had gone well.=20 =20
They system was finished, the tests were concluded,=20 the client's last changes were even included.=20 And the user exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt,=20 "IT'S JUST WHAT I ASKED FOR, BUT NOT WHAT I WANT."=20 ------=_NextPart_000_0061_01C06C11.0CBB4FE0 Content-Type: text/html;

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<DIV>PROGRAMMERS =
NIGHT BEFORE=20
CHRISTMAS   Twas the night before implementation and all = through the=20
house not a program was working, not even a browse. The = programmers hung=20
round their cubes in despair with hopes that a miracle soon would be = there.=20
   The users were nestled all snug in their beds while =
visions of=20
inquiries danced in their heads. When out of the cope there arose = such a=20
clatter I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter. =
   And=20

what to my wandering eyes should appear but a super contractor with = a six=20
pack of beer. His resume glowed with experience so rare he = turned out=20
great code with a bit-pushers flair.   More rapid than = eagles, his=20
programs they came - he whistled and shouted and called them by = name;=20
 "on update, on add, on enquire, on delete, on batch jobs, on =
closing, on=20
function complete."   His eyes were glazed over, fingers = nimble and=20
lean from weekends and nights spent in front of the screen. A = wink of=20
his eye and a twist of his head soon gave me to know I had nothing = dread.=20
   He spoke not a word but went straight to his work =
 turning=20

specs into code; then he turned with a jerk and laying his finger = upon the=20
enter key, the system came up and worked perfectly. =
   The=20

updates updated, the deletes they deleted, the inquiries inquired, = the=20
closing completed. He tested each whistle, he tested each bell, =
 and with=20

nary abend, all had gone well.   They system was finished, = the tests=20
were concluded, the client's last changes were even included. =
 And the=20

user exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt, "IT'S JUST WHAT I ASKED = FOR, BUT=20
NOT WHAT I WANT." </DIV> Received on Fri Dec 22 2000 - 11:16:44 CST